Goldilocks And The Three Bears: Death & Porridge (2024)

A certain Marsupial saved this from being the worst this year but if you want more cinematic absurdity, I give you Goldilocks. #jackmeatsflix

If you like your horror with a side of humor this flick is a love story that just won’t take no for an answer. #jackmeatsflix

If you’re looking for an actual killer koala movie, just grab a stuffed animal & shake it in front of your face while talking to yourself. It’ll be far more

If you want ridiculous gore, over-the-top fun, and a movie that loves zombies as much as you do, grab a beer and pop this flick on. #jackmeatsflix

If you want to experience true horror, try explaining this movie’s logic to someone who hasn’t seen it. It’ll haunt you longer than the film itself. #jackmeatsflix

A rushed but entertaining scifi horror flick with strong practical effects and a bleak atmosphere, just don’t expect a fully fleshed-out story. #jackmeatsflix

This snappy but toothless creature feature has some well-placed limb removals just don't expect it to have much bite. #jackmeatsflix

This horror flick that found its way onto my watchlist may look nice but flounders in ambiguity without enough payoff. #jackmeatsflix

This horror flick successfully blends supernatural horror with real-world anxieties to deliver a worthwhile watch for fans of modern creature features. #jackmeatsflix

This Cronenberg Best Picture nominee most likely won't win BUT I do believe Demi Moore takes home her Oscar in one of my favorites of the year. #jackmeatsflix